Matthew 18:15-17


  • Choosing to live unoffended starts by being offended.
  • Offense are powerful – they can destroy individuals, marriages, families  and beyond.
  • Offenses by default focus on the personal pain caused by others.

“Living unoffendable is not about denying the wrongdoing. It seeks a way to love beyond, and to love in spite of the offense.”

How to handle an offense

If a person sins against you

  • ​Have they sinned against me or simply annoyed me?
  • If it is annoying, you choose to overlook it. (Pr. 19:11)
  • How do I know if it’s sin?  Use the Scriptures to define it.

Go to them (directly)

  • Do not go to someone else and vent
  • The goal is to gain them back

And tell them Their fault

  • Lit.  “rebuke them” – Expose it
  • Motive must be to resolve, not to dump

If they are not open, bring two or three witnesses

  • The purpose is to convince the offender of their sin

If they are still hardened, tell it to the church

  • Open the circle to those directly related to them in community.

If they still refuse to acknowledge their sin, let me be as pagans

  • Extreme situations require extreme measures. (I Cor 5:5)

Offenses that are not addressed, (whenever possible) can lie dormant.

You cannot live unoffendable and have carry offenses you have not addressed.

The #1 ways division happens is when we don’t attempt to resolve conflict.  Who do I need to have “the conversation” with?


Having the Conversation with God

(Colossians 3:13)

S -cripture

…bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

O – bservation

  • What is this verse telling me? What is it about?

A – pply

  • What and how can I put this into practice?

P – ray

  • Turn what you wrote down into a prayer.